Tuesday July 24, 2007

Miami Beach defends crappy new lifeguard stands

New Times Miami illustration by Mike Gorman

Illustration by Mike Gorman, New Times.

While I was sleeping, last week’s New Times quoted me as saying “Whoever thought this piece of shit up missed the spirit of the originals by a mile, and should be kicked in his patriotic balls.” It accompanies this article by Janine Zeitlin, which defends the new lifeguard stands as cheaper, and opens, “Tourists love ‘em. So say Miami Beach city officials.” Well duh, they haven’t seen the originals. “With art deco, everything goes.” Um, don’t even get me started. People come from all over the world by the millions, as much for the beach as for anything else, and you’re justifying your cheapness while spending lavishly on park overhauls, Washington Ave. “beautification” (as if anybody cares about Washington Ave.), and tax refunds. The lifeguard stands should have been restored or recreated according to the original designs. And Scott Timm should have said so when asked, not begged off because the stands are not technically in the historic district.

Anyway, the quote (“Ript from the blogs,” not in the online version) provides a link to the photo (where the above quote is from). NT also helpfully linked to my Sun-Sentinel website writeup (so did Elad, thanks) and a recent weekend todo. Wow.

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  1. Canes816    Tue Jul 24, 10:39 AM #  

    Atrocious. By chance, do you have a picture somewhere of the original version for contrast? The new stands are a serious eyesore, even though I’m probably a terrorist for saying so

  2. alesh    Tue Jul 24, 10:58 AM #  

    I have a partial set that I shot during the transition last year with some old and some new ones — I’ll post it one of these days.

  3. Dave    Tue Jul 24, 11:04 AM #  

    On the bright side, it would make a nice hot dog stand on the 4th of July!

  4. alesh    Tue Jul 24, 11:28 AM #  

    It could make even nicer things on the 4th of July then a hot dog stand.

    I’m thinking bonfire.

  5. Jonathan    Tue Jul 24, 01:33 PM #  

    I liked the Jetsons vibe .

  6. swampthing    Thu Jul 26, 10:35 PM #  

    If you see someone drowning in patriotism, it is likely too late to save them from authoritarianism. If you live in a town with money to burn, expect more squander and inequity.

  7. Missing Miami    Thu Aug 23, 12:35 PM #  

    ‘Tourists love them???’ I doubt it. As a (very) frequent visitor for the last 15 years, I can attest to the importance of replacing the new stands with more appropriate designs. Not only do the old ones epitomize Miami Beach, these stands are also the only real structures on the beach and help set the tone for a visitor’s experience. It would truly be a disappointment to keep the replacements… may I suggest that the City hold a design contest for new stands? Maybe the prize for best design could be a sledgehammer (I’ll even donate one) to take down the current garbage.